I had the opportunity this weekend to spend time with family, do a lot of driving and a lot of thinking. All good things...except for maybe the thinking part.
Of course...thinking is not a problem for me...thinking positively...well, that is more of a stretch. But for the last few weeks, I just really am focusing on thinking about what it will be like to be on the other side of this part of my Journey.
I keep talking about change and ALL the change happening in my life...and I know that at some point...those changes will be made and new ones will enter the picture...
You know the saying, "the more things change, the more they stay the same". I have never quite gotten what that means...and the French guy (Jean-Baptiste Alphonse Karr) who said it originally is dead and thus not available for explanation...so here is a Fluffy girl's take (whose not dead yet) as it applies to my more recent experience.
Everyday there is change...and seemingly more of it...There has to be in order to move forward...Everyday there is a challenge, a decision to be made, a direction to go, and everyday that changes...
Everyday there are choices to be made and everyday I can make good ones or bad ones...and everyday I do!
Everyday, I wake up into a world of change. Constant Change...not only in my own little world...but in the broader landscape of ALL of those that impact my little world...All Over the World!!
Though my daily life may look the same on a macro level...if you drill down and focus in on the daily details...they change everyday...little nuances or variations on a theme!!
Change is constant...and in that regard, Everyday is the Same.
So why so much fretting when it comes to change????...AHHHH....the million dollar question...I think just like with anything...I have a tendency to measure the importance of Change as it relates to perceived impact...
We use phrases like "Life Changing" (I alone, have used this phrase thousands of times just in the last nearly 2 years)
Catastrophic Change
Radical Change
"The Change"
Positive Change
All of the above phrases invoke a sense of "bigness"...a grandiose kind of change...at least for me.
That kind of change...can be scary...fear can creep in when I make a "life changing" decision...fear of failure or losing parts of my life that I think I MUST not lose!!
Fear that I will find out that I am not capable of the change was a BIG one when I started this part of my Journey and rears its ugly head from time to time!!
Yet...as much as I fear some of the Big Change...I plow through my Everyday... moving from one change to another without paralyzing fear of failure...or I would never leave the house!
My success so far and for that matter, my failures, are rarely about the BIG changes...but more readily about all of the little daily changes that keep me moving forward...in my Fight to Light.
When I started this Journey...the below is the very first quote I used as almost a battle cry...it is a very small excerpt from one of my favorite songs...as recorded by Adele...but written by Bob Dylan.
"The winds of change are blowing wild and free
You ain't seen nothin' like me yet."
I can truthfully say that I had NO IDEA how true that would be for me...I had no idea that it would be ME who "ain't seen nothing like me yet"
The winds of change are STILL blowing wild and free and lately have been quite gusty!!! AND...in the words of an old Gospel song (and inspiration for one of my favorite books by Maya Angelou)
Well, I started out travelin' for the Lord many years ago,
I've had a lot of heartache, I've met a lot of grief and woe.
But when I would stumble, then I would humble down,
And there I would say I wouldn't take nothing for my journey now.
I would not take a single thing for this Journey now...even amid my at times, graceless travels through this Change...I would not trade any of it!
So...as always, I will continue to need your wisdom, support and prayers..as I face the daily changes AND the Big changes...Everyday...The Same thing until it changes!!!
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