Sunday, August 31, 2014

A Lesson in Every Challenge

Really tired tonight. 

Did a 10 mile bike ride this morning followed by



Helping a friend move

Visit family



Need to go to bed...

Struggling a bit with food today...sadly, that is a battle I still fight.

Too tired to fight anymore tonight...

Going to Bed

Boot camp at 8:30 AM...

Better post tomorrow night...

For tonight...just need to remember that there is a lesson in every challenge and a blessing in every lesson!

Tomorrow is a new day!  Forging on...

Saturday, August 30, 2014

The Hundred Foot Journey

So...I went to the movies today...It was a good day for it.

 I have shared before that I at times, struggle with just "being"...relaxing...taking it easy...all of that!  I think that though this probably sounds a little off...I am baffled by having energy after not having any for so long.

So baffled in fact, that I think that if I have energy that means I am supposed to be "doing something"...all the time.  The contradiction for me is that I know that I times, I just need to chill...slow down and give my brain, body and spirit a rest. 

So...I was not doing a good job "relaxing" at home so...I decided that an escape into a movie would be a great answer. music...can speak to me in a completely different language.  I can relax, slow down and give my spirit a break in the movies. 

Unless a movie really sucks...I usually find some solace and entertainment from sitting in a dark movie theater...getting lost for a couple of hours in a story...BUT....when a movie is GREAT...the experience is sublime.  Like great music, a great movie can actually transport me to a completely different place, can ease a busy mind and calm an anxious body!!! 

Tonight....I saw that kind of movie.

Truth is....I could talk for hours about this movie....the acting, the story, the scenery...the FOOD (of course)...I loved every single minute. 

Even more...the symbolism of the Journey in this story...the short physical distance of  100 feet and the emotional, spiritual and cultural journey that made the expanse of that 100 feet feel like a million miles. 

As corny as it may sound...It made me think of how small (on some level) the distance of losing 120lbs in 12 months felt when I started...and about how today my Journey is no longer about 120lbs in 365 days...but instead, seems to have morphed into a life Journey...a Journey that still includes the shedding of those 120lbs but that encompasses so much more...

If I may continue waxing poetic here for just a moment...I think that the beauty of the Journey depicted in the movie was the fact that only 100 feet separated the characters...but the distance between them...between their hearts and their cultures appeared unending...until Love brought that distance back the to the original 100 feet where the Journey began....where it all started.

My personal Journey started as a 100 foot Journey in a sense...a journey just to the other side of 120lbs...but the expanse of my 100 feet has been changing, heart warming and earth shaking...and still in process. 

The movie...well...I thought it was beautiful...poignant, thought provoking and filled with great love...

Tonight, I feel like I have traveled around the world...met some amazing, talented people, ate some great food and experienced great love...and I did not even travel 10 miles from home.

Now I must sleep!  Thanks for reading...and thanks for being a part of my 100 Foot Journey.

Friday, August 29, 2014

Hope For The Miracles Yet to Come

Nothing like the Friday before a long weekend!  Happy, Happy, Joy, Joy!! 

I am feeling just a tad under the I am a little anxious about boot camp this evening!  We shall see what this Fluffy Girl is made of though...cause I am going!

I had a conversation today about being know, chronically speaking! I was talking to someone about how life used to be in the not so distant past. As I was talking, I suddenly felt a huge rush of relief!  It was just one of those moments when I was viscerally aware of how much life has improved for me.  Even on a day when I really am not feeling too hot...I have the desire and energy to follow through with a workout!!!  It feels surreal. 

There have been a thousand surreal moments on this Journey...some bigger than others.  But it is the little moments...those random realizations...that seem to take my breath away...or in reality...allow me to breathe easier!

As I shared a few of my experiences about living with chronic illness...I realized the magnitude of the miracle of this Journey all over again and Trust is a miracle.

 I know that I say so many of the same things so often many accounts of what appears to be the same observation...but for me, each time I say out loud (or in writing) how blown away I am by the Power of God's Grace and the beauty of the miracle that I get to live in becomes a little more real...a lot more exciting and fills my heart with hope for the miracles yet to come!

Thursday, August 28, 2014

Happiness Grows

I love the below very true for me. 

Though I think it hugely important to have goals and reasonable expectations of completing those goals...accepting the pace, the path and acceptance of those whose paths I cross along my way...that is where happiness lives!

When I have expectations that don't line up with reality...I get myself into trouble.

I am having to learn that acceptance is not about giving in or giving up..but rather, is about letting go...trusting, believing and being patient! As I learn that...My Happiness Grows!

Goodnight my friends! 

Wednesday, August 27, 2014

Brave Enough To Keep Moving Forward! Go Team Clint!

So...I made it through day Two of Boot Camp...I think!!!  The jury is out!  I am already feeling a bit, what I might call, muscular I am guessing that by the time this 47 year old body gets out of bed in the morning...I will be in the advanced stages of  "Dear God, what have I done!"
I tried a new machine this evening.  First, just as a reminder, when I started this Journey 2 years ago, I began just walking...and swimming only to decide one fateful day to step on this evil machine call the Elliptical. the beginning, I struggled to get in 10 minutes on that machine without feeling as if I was going to collapse...but over time and after several major battles, I conquered the Evil Elliptical!!!! 

Tonight however, I met my new arch nemesis...

THIS machine is beyond evil...It is diabolical.  It looks doable.  It IS NOT!! part of our circuit training this evening, I had the option of doing intervals on the stationary bike OR 6 continuous minutes on Jacob's ladder.  I chose the ladder.  I need to prepare for climbing...Ladder climbing seems a good training I say...I'll do the ladder...6 big twig...I got this!!!  So...I get on....attach my safety harness...and I begin!!  First few steps...Yea...I got this...still feeling pretty confident....
ONE MINUTE and I retreated to the bike tout suite!!!
So...I now have a new foe to conquer.  I don't who the hell Jacob is...but his ladder bites!!! out Jacob....I am comin' for ya!  It just may be a while before I get there!!!
Before I go....I want to share a picture of my young cousin Clint.  As most of  you know, he was in a serious boating accident July 4th weekend.  He gratefully survived the horrific accident; however, is having to learn to walk again with a prosthetic leg.  Clint lost his right leg in the accident but did not lose his brave spirit, sense of humor and wonderful heart!  Clint is currently in the hospital going through intensive physical therapy and learning to walk with his new leg.  It is a painful process, yet he is fighting through with this brave face!
He amazes and inspires.  He is BRAVE!  GO TEAM CLINT
As I write this tonight...My reality is that bravery is not the absence of fear...It is not a characteristic of the fearless...but instead, a characteristic of those who face fear with great faith...a characteristic of those that take the next step without full knowledge of where they are going...but are brave enough to keep moving forward!!!!

Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Trusting My Wings Day One of boot camp and I am still moving...even made it to the gym for a little cardio!

My goal is to keep moving so that my body does not have time to realize that it is  being stretched outside its comfort zone! :)

It felt like a little victory though....being able to survive Day 1 and make it to the gym tonite! Another step in a healthy direction!  No giant leap for Mankind...but a solid step along my Journey to De-Fluff! an effort to be prepared for Boot Camp Day 2...I must rest...renew and replenish! 

My prayer every night is to be in God's in His plans and have the faith and courage I need to Forge ahead.

There are days when this task feels a little daunting.  But I am surrounded by reminders of how blessed I am to be on this Journey...reminders of ALL the ways God lights my path...Even on days when I struggle. 

One of the biggest challenges I have faced and still face is truly and deeply BELIEVING that I CAN.

This blog has been my practice ground in many ways. The place where I write my truth...and the place I write truths that I am yet to believe! 

I received the below from my cousin Julie today...loved it!

I am learning to trust my wings...every day! 

Monday, August 25, 2014

Linguine Arms and Burning Lungs

So bootcamp started TODAY!

4 weeks....12 we GO!

Today..according to our trainer Kevin, was  nothing too strenuous...just an opportunity to see where we each are  physically.  I know where I am...mid forties...50+lbs overweight with joints that reflect both my age and weight!

Four women...gratefully...all with a sense of humor...started this process today!

Good news...I enjoyed it...I survived it...i laughed through it...and did not puke! So I got that goin' for me!

I, for the 1st time, got to do the "battle ropes" know the one where you pick up a big ass rope and shake it up and down...Well, for some reason I was all primed and ready to try that out...3 sets at 30 second intervals left me with linguine arms and sucking wind!!! Holy Toledo!!!

But...I did it! I thought my lungs would explode...but I did it!

I am going to go out a limb here and say that each day will be a little tougher...and there may be puking involved!!! ;)

But...I have got a Mountain to I will keep suiting up and showing up!!!

It feels good to push through burning lungs and linguine forge on knowing that I am working towards bigger goals and pushing past physical barriers that at one time, felt impenetrable! 

Pretty Cool...

As you many of you may know, for this ENTIRE Journey,  my Mom has posted signs of encouragement on the door leading from the garage to the house.  She changes them periodically...usually goal specific.  

Below is my newest sign!

Look out Now!!!