Monday, June 30, 2014

Resiliency is a MUST

So I started a Standard Process Cleanse abbreviated version. 

In less than 30 days, I will be boarding a plane and heading to Long Beach, CA to support, cheer and selfishly...hopefully, get a booster shot of inspiration from my inspiration...My favorite Olympian, Kerri Walsh Jennings.

I started the cleanse in hopes that I can detox a bit...lose more weight and FOCUS...FOCUS...FOCUS.

I have found in doing these very regimented cleanses that it requires a great deal of focus, mental and physical diligence that seems to remind my mind and body that I am on a bigger journey to negate my food addiction and improve my health. 

Additionally, we are headlong into the planning and execution phase of our 2nd Annual Play It Forward-Rally To Serve Event.  Another action that requires a different level of that challenges my courage, faith and organizational skill set! 

I continue to vow to tell the truth here for myself and because I think it is important for the integrity of this Journey.  Having said that...I am finding myself challenged by lapses in faith and trust...

I want this Event to be is important to me and is something I feel called to do...I want this Journey to be too, is important to me and is something that I HAVE to  do...It is something I feel called to do....

Inspiration is Key....Resiliency is an Absolute Must...

Late last week, Kerri shared the following article about the 5 Characteristics of Incredibly Resilient People.

Normally, I would just post the link to the article so that those that want to can read the text...however, I am posting this article in its entirety...for myself...and for others. 

Kerri posted that she strives to be the "Elegant Spirit" described in this article...I shared with her that from my view, she already IS an "Elegant Spirit"... As I read through the article....I realized that I believe that we all have the ability to BE an Elegant Spirit...and I further realized that with Great Faith...comes Incredible Resiliency.

So I will continue to practice this Walk In Faith...I will look to God, inwardly and to others for the inspiration it will take to continue to move ahead.  I strive to be this Elegant Spirit...This Incredibly Resilient Person!

Here is the article...

I remember the day I found out that my aunt had cancer. Although she was the most positive person I had ever met, I still worried about how she would handle such an overwhelming diagnosis.
Looking back, now that her cancer is in remission, she continues to be the most positive person I know. But even more than that, she is what I call an elegant spirit.
Cancer, in my aunt's world, was a small valley hidden amongst the many glorious peaks of her life. While she may have had some moments of despair as we all do when we find ourselves alone in our thoughts, unable to see the light at the end of the tunnel, she never showed this to the world outside.
She never complained. During her treatment, she continued to go to work and share her passion. She turned long days of chemotherapy in the hospital into a party with her friends where they would share stories, laugh and play cards.
Life threw her an arrow, and she, an archer herself, caught this arrow and created her bow. She knew that she could not control the fact that this arrow had come to her, but her bow could hold it stable. Instead of defeating her, the arrow ultimately strengthened her.
As a physician, I have met many such elegant spirits. Their resilience is awe-inspiring. They have the ability to handle even the most devastating diagnosis.
How then, do people cultivate such strength? And how can we do that for ourselves?

Here are five things resilient people have in common:

1) They practice mindfulness

Mindfulness is the art of paying attention to your life on purpose. Mindful people monitor the thoughts that come through them. However, instead of reacting to their negative thoughts, they observe them like a storm that is passing through.
Furthermore, they pay attention to what is right in their lives. They give it strength and value, thereby turning up the volume on the beauty that surrounds them.
They understand their role in the universal flow of life. They realize that they are a part of a divine cycle of life and death.
And in this understanding, they remain like the eye at the center of a tornado.
The world will continue to change around them. But at the center of this tornado, is their mind, where there is tranquility and calm.

2) They don't compare themselves to others

They don't spend their time feeling sorry for themselves. They realize that every soul has a different journey and therefore it is pointless to compare the path of your life with someone else.
They are continually trying to be the new and improved version of themselves. And as long as they are better than they were yesterday, they know they are on the right path.
They are their own measuring stick of success.

3) They understand that after every big setback is an even bigger transformation

I remember in medical school when part of our rotation was to learn how to deliver bad news to patients, I shadowed a physician who informed a young 40-year-old woman that she had stage four breast cancer.
Immediately, without missing a beat, this woman said, "I know one thing. After every big setback is an even bigger transformation."
Resilient people understand this. They see difficulties as stepping stones to a transformation.

4) They find humor in everything

Laughter, in its very highest form, is a spiritual practice. It connects us to the part of our soul that heals. When we laugh with others, we gain a sense of interconnectedness and belonging.
Laughter may help lower our blood pressure and increase our vascular blood flow. It can do wonders for our health.
Resilient people look for reasons to laugh. They find humor in the mundane. They understand that paying attention to the ordinary is what makes life extraordinary.

5) They do not try to control their lives

Gary Zukav wrote about elegant spirits like this:
The journey of a hawk depends on both the hawk and the wind. The wind is your life. It is all the things that happen from the time you are born and the time you go home. Elegant spirits don't know what will come up next, the same way that hawks don't know which way the wind will blow next.
This doesn't bother them, because they don't try to control their lives any more than hawks try to control the wind.
Resilient people do not try to control their lives. They surrender to the flow of the wind. They adjust their sails and ride the next wave of their life.
People that have overcome hardships, tremendous obstacles or disease often feel that life goes from black and white in the before to many beautiful colors in the after. The have turned up the volume of beauty in their lives. They practice mindfulness. They stop comparing themselves to others. They find humor in everything.
And they know that they have been transformed.

            BY Smita Malhotra, M.D.

To DONATE to Play It Forward-Rally To Serve


Friday, June 27, 2014

In Search Of Eternal Bliss

It is Friday...truly...Thank God!  It has been a challenging week!

I so wish I was one of those people that live in the Silver Lining...You know those wonderful people that weather the storm AND see the beauty of the challenge IN THE MOMENT!

That ain't me! I do my best to weather....but my Silver Lining moment is a little slow to shine through at times...

This week in this Journey has been jammed with unexpected challenges....tests of my spirit and my Fortitude and opportunities to fall flat on my face!  Of course....those challenges offer Silver Linings...they always do...I just don't always see them for clouds...

So today...I am making a concerted effort to see the hear the message and to be grateful for the opportunity to learn it...without eating cupcakes as a coping mechanism!

Wish me luck!

Below are just a couple of thoughts somebody else thought...wrote and shared...
I am sharing them with I continue my Journey to let my soul shine in search of eternal BLISS...:)

Tuesday, June 24, 2014

Just a Little Pick Me Up

I am in need of a little pick me up today.  There are days when the Journey feels bigger than my willpower....bigger than my courage and stronger than my fight!

On these days...I try to keep my head down...eyes on the road and prayers on my lips!

On these days...I try to stay away from major decisions...try to keep life simple and trust that tomorrow is a New Day!

Sometimes, on days like today,  I find myself going down that introspective road...seeking some deeply hidden answer or solution...but today...I just don't have it in, I decided to share the following! Just a few funnies and observations....just keeping it real...real light!

Monday, June 23, 2014

Help Me Share the LOVE keeping with the idea of last night's post...I am here today to spend a couple of minutes "passing on" the Blessings I have received by reaching out to you for your support for our 2nd Annual:

I have been so incredibly blessed over the past 2 years that I cannot hardly wrap my head around it.  I have had the opportunity to be the recipient of other's kindness, grace and generosity in ways that literally blow my mind.
I can tell you that very often I think about how I might "pay back" some of those blessings.  Last year, this event was a celebration of the end of my 1st year on this Journey and a way in which I could outwardly give back in some way...a way in which I could maybe "Pay Forward" the amazing love I had received by the truckloads!!
I was surrounded by an amazing group of people who wanted to help me see these efforts pay off by giving back.
This year...the blessings continue to light my way on this Journey...
I again, am surrounded by a group of people that are brave enough to make this Journey with me again...and again...This event is about giving back in anyway I can...this event is about Passing Along God's it travels to others.
I know that many of you are busy, committed to other causes and are overcoming your own challenges.  I hope though, that you will join me for this event.  I would love to celebrate this Journey with you by sharing something that I love with those that I love!
I have learned a tremendous amount in working to organize and host a charity event and I have a deep respect for those that do this day in and day out.  It is challenging...however, ultimately an amazing experience!
As we approach the date of the event, I hope to share with you some of the reasons why I have chosen the charities (Cy-Hope and Good Tiding Foundation)  that we support and some of the amazing ways in which those organizations impact our communities.
Over the next several weeks, my posts will include information on how to donate to this event and how to participate by joining us for an afternoon of great family fun!
Please take a few moments to check out our event page on Facebook at:
If you have questions regarding joining us you can email us at
If you find it in your heart to contribute to our event, you can do so via our PayPal account
Your support through your attendance, your contributions and your prayers is most appreciated.
I hope to see you in August! 
Help me share the L-O-V-E!

Sunday, June 22, 2014

Just Passing Through

I heard a single sentence in church this morning that inspired this post:

We are the recipient of God's Love as it passes through us on its way to others.

The sermon was about giving back...paying forward the abundance of God's Grace and that we have a responsibility to be an active conduit of that Love...

The minute I heard the sentence I visualized "The Wave".  If you have ever been to a large sporting event you have probably been a part of or seen "The Wave"...a ripple effect, on-your-feet kind of cheer that is passed on from one section of the arena to the next until it reaches the opposite side of the arena and potentially continues around and around in a continuous loud, celebration...quite joyfully!

I share often here of the daily blessings and grace I receive as I make this Journey...this Wave of God's unwavering it passes through me and on its way to others.

Without it, I would have never lost a pound, walked a mile, climbed a hill, or faced the challenges of failing health and a rapidly aging body...

Without the transference of God's love from those that are in my daily life and those that are just passing through...I will not have the strength and courage needed to continue on this Journey.

I KNOW that as God's love passes through my life, it travels to me from others...I know this because I have felt it in a gesture, a conversation, a smile, through tears...through joys, through vulnerability and through the strength of those that God chooses to place in my life.

Sometimes I feel God's presence immediately and at other is a slow realization that hits me just like the thunderous sound of The Wave as it reaches the other side of the arena!

I believe that as I receive these daily blessings...these expressions of love...It is my responsibility to get on my feet...and loudly pass on God's love to the next the people that are part of my daily life and those in whose lives I am just passing through.

On my Feet...Arms up...Loudly Celebrating....Sharing the Love as it passes through me on its way to others...on its way to you!

Happy Sunday....Ride the Wave!

Thursday, June 19, 2014

Angels Along This Journey

So I feel like I am general, but specifically, in regards to posting here.

So much going on this last much going on this much more to come...

Really trying to keep my focus on my "new" diet and exercise plan...and staying healthy as I, along with some faithful friends/family, are kicking into fundraising/charity event planning gear!
Which of course,  adds a new wrinkle to the whole, ever-evolving work/life balancing act!

Staying healthy has been a bit of a challenge lately as I am in a pattern of daily migraine headaches again...but as they say these days...."Ain't nobody got time for that"!  Any extra anti-migraine prayers you might have to share would be most appreciated! I have said many times friends and family are often my Angels along this Journey.  They pump me up...cheer me on...tolerate my whining....laugh WITH me and AT me and love me through each day!

This past weekend....I got a much needed dose of family to go along with my Soul Grooves class and time with some of my Angel friends...

These are the people that keep my Soul groovin'! Every Day...these are some of the reasons I am choosing a healthier life.

So despite the fact that I have been perfectly imperfect along this Journey....despite the fact that I have turned a year long weight loss Journey into an epic saga...
I still find that I have a courageous, funny, patient, really patient...troupe of kick butt Angels on my side...all around me!

Here are a few pics!

Tuesday, June 17, 2014

What Doesn't Kill Makes You Stronger!

Like I was saying...Things are busy...and heating up everyday!!!  WE ARE 2 MONTHS AWAY from Play it Forward-Rally to Serve Year 2!!!!

We are in full gear preparing for this years event!!!  You will be hearing lots about it!!!

So Mark your Calendars...SATURDAY, AUGUST 16TH, 2014 AT 1:00 PM-5:00 PM
Of course...I am still working to try and drop at least a few more pounds before the event...just for motivation!!!
On Saturday...I did another mini-goal I had done last year...a doozie of a fitness class called Soul Grooves!!!
The creator and instructor Tammy Harris is unbelievable and recently won a national contest on the the Kelly and Michael show.
Here is a clip
This is no ordinary dance/aerobic class...THIS class will kick thine butt!!! 
So on dear friends Brigette, Kathy and her kiddos (shout out to Olivia and Cloie) all suited up and showed to bust our Soul Grooves!!! 
Now...given the path of this is NO SURPRISE to me...that there is an undeniable depth of "Soul" in Tammy's Groove that makes this class yet one more reminder that God is guiding this Journey. 
It makes me smile to think that while I am busting a move ( a sight to see I am sure)...that I SO felt a spiritual "Soul" connection...
You see...I had done this class 6 months or so ago...and really felt the "Soul" connection then...but physically it was quite a challenge...especially the next day!!!
So on Saturday...I had a bad feeling that I was not going to handle the class physically...I have been having some health struggles and just not feeling strong lately!
I had hoped that I would have that same "Soulful" connection and that maybe that would see me through my physical shortcomings!!!
But guess what!!!  I did it...Just when I thought "I Can't"...God said, "Oh Yes You Can!!!!  I physically held up...Spiritually held on!!!! 
It is so funny to me the way in which God has given me Angels along this all forms, shapes, sizes...any number of manifestations...Angels that pull me up, push me through...carry me over and help me rise above the obstacles.
Even when I don't believe...these Angels DO!!!
Here are a couple of pics!!!
Tammy and I...please note the that I am drenched!!! I am telling this is one serious workout!!!

Brig and I with our Soul Grooves T-Shirts!  1st Edition!!!

And lastly...Brigette sent this to me...made me LOL!!!

Generally though...What Doesn't Kill You...DOES make you stronger!!!!


Sunday, June 15, 2014

The Journey Continues...

It has been a jam packed weekend...with lots of a mini goal.  It late thirty...and I have a busy week ahead...but LOTS to blog about over the next few days!

But for tonight...I am grateful!  Grateful that this Journey continues...

Continues to be a blessing

Continues to challenge me

Continues to remind me that just when I think I CAN'T. ..I CAN

Continues to be filled with Angels

And Continues to be filled with God's unrelenting GRACE!

Congrats to Kerri Walsh Jennings and April Ross for winning AGAIN....they are ROCKSTARS inside and out!

Congrats to the San Antonio Spurs for winning ANOTHER NBA title...

AND Congrats to Wilson Thomas Teague for hitting his FIRST Grand Slam! Like A Boss!!!


Wednesday, June 11, 2014

One Pedal At a Time


Man...I am feeling the uphill climb of hump day today!  Drained and Pained!!!

 I am trying to lose 20lbs by mid I have this sense of urgency....which can be a good thing.  AND...unfortunately...I am physically off my game these last several days. 

Last night...I took one for the team...and made my way to the gym. is not out of the ordinary for me to make a reluctant walk into the gym on any given day...however, I usually get going once I am there and shake off my apathy pretty quickly...

Last night...not so much the case! 

I am having a few physical surprise at 47 years of age and no surprise given my less than stellar health history!  So I have a few things to "work around" during my workouts this last couple of weeks...particularly a rather raucous back spasm!!! 

So last was the recumbent bike for me!!  I felt like it was my first time on the bike!!!  Sluggish...Sluggish and more Sluggish...

I turned on the TV (on the bike)...said a little prayer and tuned into the Spurs vs. Heat NBA Finals game...hoping the view of the powerhouse NBA players cruising up and down the court... would help me find my mojo and "rebound" a bit from my sluggishness...One Pedal at a Time!

So hear is the good news...I managed to complete one hour on the bike...burn a few hundred calories and...cheer on the Spurs...

The bad news...well...I am physically struggling a bit...aware that I have "been there and done that" though...I will continue to push forward...trusting that I am still on pace to meet my goal...God's Pace...God's timing!

Prayers as always are welcome and needed...

I did receive the following from an old friend...a friend who has diligently kept up with this crazy Journey to defluff...this crazy roller coaster I am on...She sent me these words as a new mantra:

"Every Day, in Every Way, I am getting better and better." ~Emile Coue

This is a great thought to embrace...Yesterday, I wanted to just drop...lay down and NOT move...but instead...God gave me the strength to move ahead...One Pedal at A Time! That is better!!! 

Monday, June 9, 2014

Open to Receive

Accepting all prayers...words of encouragement....pearls of wisdom...epiphanies....lightning bolts...burning bushes...whatever you have to share...I am open to receive!

The Fluffy girl is a little under the weather and overly challenged in this whole weight loss thing today!!

So....on days like today...I like to just open up my mind...heart....eyes...ears...whatever it the Grace...Wisdom...Knowledge...L.O.V.E.

All the good that God gives me daily...

Tonight... I am just feeling fluffy...frustrated...and fearful!

Looking for a little fearlessness...a little fortitude and a whole lotta Faith!

Tomorrow IS another Day! ANOTHER chance to be better than I was today!

So if you have any inspiration to share...Inspire Away!!!

Goodnight and God Bless!

Thursday, June 5, 2014

Accentuate The Positive-A Fluffy Girl and her Feelings

"Eat only when your hungry"...."Stop when you are full"....Don't eat after 6:00 PM...Don't Eat after 8:00 PM....Drink water before you eat...Drink Water after you eat....

There are lots of "Simple" "how to" tips out there for us fat folks to lose weight...and quite frankly...most of them probably work... has been my experience that most people who say these things to me...have not met many who struggle with eating from an emotional place...or a busy place...or a distracted, overwhelmed...Dear God...I need Cake... kind of place!!!

I have owned from the very beginning that I am an emotional eater!  No Doubt about it! And I will not lie...when someone says to just need to....(fill in the blank) less, drink more water, eat before 8:00 only half of what is on your plate...etc...I want to say...No Kidding...You Think?

If my eating were all about following a set of rote rules...If my eating habits were based on logic...I would not be blogging about being fat or me!!

So my friend Lindsey sends me this article about Emotional Eating...(she gets it)...

As I read it...quickly...I realize that flows in this logical, if you do this...then this will happen kind of way...

Here is my problem...when I am in my emotional self...logic is limited!  Words like reason, accountability...out the window...

So here's the deal...this is a good article...makes really good points...truly!  Good suggestions on how to combat the process of emotional eating...

The problem is me...I need an article that gives me tips on how not to BE EMOTIONAL...

You know...articles that might be titled...

10 Easy Steps to Get Rid of Emotions...

Feel Less...Eat Less...

A Fluffy Girl's Guide to Emotional Freedom...Or Freedom FROM Emotions maybe "not feeling" is unrealistic...but, today,  it seems more realistic than NOT eating when I am feeling!!  :)


So...I guess I will read this article a few times through and try to convince myself that the solution to a bad day...hurt feelings or unexplained grouchiness...does not come in the form of a Pizza or chocolate cake...

Oh...and by the way...#9 (in the article)...says to Play with your Dog INSTEAD of eating....Well...they obviously don't know my dog...She thinks that EATING is Playing!!!


In truth...some of the suggestions in the article are a big part of what I attempt to do daily...and am particularly focused on these...such as Portion Control....Not keeping tempting foods in the house...eating balanced meals...ALL of which read more simply than they are accomplished for me...

However...Attitude is Key...Gotta Keep Trying...Gotta Accentuate the Positive... (I feel a song coming on...)

Accentuate The Positive-Ella Fitzgerald

Wednesday, June 4, 2014

Watching Paint Dry

Life is one moment it feels like it moves at an absolute crawl and then...without any notice or can whip into a frenzy and just absolutely feel like it flies by.

Of course...I have heavily discussed my experiences of life's pace at length here in this virtual journal documenting my life changes...almost daily.

I have used any number of analogies...clich├ę describe my experience as I navigate my ever-changing, up and down experiences during this part of my life's Journey.

Because of the goal I originally lose 120lbs in ONE year....and given that I am just over halfway there in mid year in context to reaching this goal feels like watching paint dry!

Of completely contradict that thought...with so many life many new much new found can feel like it is blowing by!!! 

But either slow or fast...Life is be be treasured and ultimately it ends.

I spend tons of time trying to figure it all out! LOL!!!  Trying to figure out at what pace I should be traveling...what I should be accomplishing...and whom I should be spending it with...

But we all know this...Life moves forward regardless of my best efforts to figure it all out...It moves forward as I wonder where it is going....It moves forward regardless of what I weigh, regardless of what I accomplish and it moves forward when I am alone or with others. 

From the beginning I have called this a Journey (even going as far as to capitalize the word EVERY time I write it).  From the very beginning I just knew that was the only word that would fit this experience.  But...Life is a Journey...the whole enchilada...the whole "shabang". 

Losing weight, gaining health, professional success, losing friends, gaining new ones, laughing, crying, learning, forgetting, falling, getting back up, breathing, and eventually not breathing anymore...ALL part of the Journey.

So in the middle of a "watching paint dry" moment in this weight loss part of my Journey...I was sharply...suddenly...reminded of the fragility of Life...and how the illusion of life rolling along slowly is just that an ILLUSION...or in my case maybe a Delusion!!!

Today, quite by accident, I found out that someone that was literally a daily part of my life during my college years 45 years of age...someone that I loved, laughed my ass off with, cried with...learned with, fought with...grew up with...someone that I gone.  Suddenly Life felt like is was zipping by...where did the time go? And what about the time that was supposed to be left?

As  you might imagine, a great sadness overwhelmed me.  It is never easy to say goodbye to someone...even if we said goodbye years ago...

I immediately began flying through the multitude of memories that live in my head and my heart...Life moving at break neck speed....A literal flash of thoughts, pictures in my mind's eye...blown through in almost a blink of an eye... impatience with the speed at which I appear to be traveling on my own Journey....suddenly seems just fine.  No hurry...after all this is no Race...This is IT...Life!

I knew I was going to post today...I had an idea...and then suddenly Life it does. Suddenly...I was given the opportunity to embrace some needed perspective...I was given the opportunity to thank God for this Journey...and for the luxury of Watching Paint Dry.

I heard a song today...a new song...the lyrics made me smile...and felt I am sharing them with you. 

Spread out arms out and lift them high
Run like a airplane in the sky
We got worries but we ain’t got time
To worry life away

Call our friends up and tell them to
And let them know why you feeling blue
The troubles they get a hold on you
When you worry life away

Lets a run a little bit faster
Hair blowing in the wind
There’s feeling here all around us
We got to breathe it in
So just smile and keep your head up
Smile and keep your head up
Smile and keep your head up high
Don’t worry life away

Giving up is an easy out
Then you got nothing to pray about
Maybe sailing smooth but your sinking down
When you worry life away

Grab a hold of your burdens why
Don’t you throw it in up to the sky
Surrender them to make ???
And kiss your worries goodbye

Lets a run a little bit faster
Hair blowing in the wind
There’s feeling here all around us
We got to breathe it in
So just smile and keep your head up
Smile and keep your head up
Smile and keep your head up high
Don’t worry life away

~Us The Duo

Sunday, June 1, 2014

God Has Planted Greatness!

Happy Sunday....

I hope this weekend has been filled with Great Love and Joy! 

My favorite Olympian and her fantastic partner (Kerri Lee and April) won the 1st AVP Beach Event of the 2014 season...and being the goofball that I am...I like to send them little encouraging notes before each tourney! 

On Friday, I sent this to them both:

I thought it perfect for them as they embark on their 1st full season together and on their Journey to Rio in 2016!!!  AND....they won!!!  However, after I sent it to them...I read and re-read these words Joyce Meyer spoke. 
I have a tendency to believe that God has planted Greatness in others...but don't always see the Greatness He has planted in me.
Greatness is a gift from God that lives in each of us....I believe that IT IS in fact a gift.  I readily see that Gift in the hearts of the people that weave in and out of my life and in the works and accomplishments of those around me. 
I struggle to see that in my life. 
But what I do see....Is that God is working in my life...daily giving me the opportunity to be Great...I just have to "Let Today Be the Beginning of A Great Adventure...or really...I have to Let Today be the Continuation of a Great Adventure.
So Tomorrow is a New Embrace the Gift of Greatness...that lies in me. 
I am one week into a new healthy eating/fitness plan....I hope to Embrace each Day of this New Plan as the opportunity to accomplish Greatness...Great Health...Great Willpower...Great Motivation and Great Accountability.
I need to write here, as a reminder to myself, that I have lost more than half of the weight I set out to lose on this weight loss Journey so far...and though I struggle at times with how long it is taking me to lose the whole 120lbs...the Truth is that God has planted Greatness in my life by providing the strength that I have needed to lose these lbs so far. 
I have to trust that more Greatness lies ahead...lies in me!
So here is to a week of embracing Greatness...even if I when I don't see it...I must believe it lies within me...lives around me and will blossom from me as I step into His Gifts!
Have a great week.