Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Drive, Faith and Fortitude

Hello to everyone and I hope you have had a great Tuesday.  I have been sidelined today by a migraine.  As many of you know, I have been battling migraines for quite some time and particularly over the past several months.  I have actually had a "headache" ( mostly migraine) since April and have seen what feels like every headache specialist in Houston.  Of course that is an exaggeration...I have only seen 10-15 doctors over the past year.  All of which mostly just say...you have a migraine!  Oh...and you are obese ( I truly loathe this word as a result).  So...I am tackling the battle of the fluff and doing my best to tackle the Migraines as well...On Days like Today...it feels like one step forward to two steps back! 
On days like today...It feels like the only thing I really have any control over is my attitude.  I have to choose to approach days like these firmly rooted in the idea that this is just one day.  That tomorrow will be different and that I have the drive, faith and fortitude to move through it.  I guess if I think about it...I need this everyday.  Drive, Faith and Fortitude. This may sound strange...but on days like today..when pain is the overriding factor...I am more likely to truly be in that "One Day at a Time" mindset.  Pain strips away the "control" part of my personality.  The truth is for me...God is always in control...however, my actions do not always follow suit.  Now...I am not saying that the pain is good...no, no, no....pain is no bueno!  However, it does force my hand...it forces me to stop and forces me to Let Go and Let God!!!  It truly forces me to hand over the control and to Trust and to have Faith. 

I once had someone ask me "how does the pain serve you"...I actually thought that was a completely bizarre question...but over the years I have thought about it and the above is what I have arrived at...I am choosing to learn something from this pain...not let just beat me down.  I do not want to misrepresent. There are days and have been days in the past several months that I am completely paralyzed by the pain and not in that ODAT mindset.  But I truly am making an attempt to just listen to my body, change the way I live, change what I put in to my body and have Faith that I am on the path God has chosen for me...The pain has something to teach me...not my favorite teacher...but a teacher nonetheless!

OK....Headed into Wednesday... a NEW DAY!  One day closer to my goal...One day further along in this Journey 120-"MAWA" Inspired! 

"But pain insists upon being attended to. God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pains: it is His megaphone to rouse a deaf world." --C.S. Lewis


  1. I missed you today! I heard this song on the radio as I was driving home and thought about you and felt like you needed to hear it too :) Google: Strong Enough by Matthew West. You may have already heard it, but it's perfect for your blog today. Plus, something my mom used to always say when we were taking care of my grandmother "this is our (your) life today, but it won't be our (your) life forever." We may have struggled, and so will you, but it's only temporary.

  2. I agree with Lindsey. This is temporary and I know you are on the path God has for you. Stay strong Cuz. I know these headaches are awful but with time and as you progress in your fitness program I just know they'll start to go away. Love you bunches...Barb.