Hi...I was perusing through some photos and found a picture of my Mom and I a little over a year ago...It was Easter 2012 and we both were just a few weeks away from a very rough time in both of our lives...
Here we are...one year later...Easter 2013...what a difference a year makes!
These are the some of the first pictures that I have looked at and really felt like I see a difference! When I look at, I see less "Moon Pie" face...and more desire to live a better life! I think we both look sick in the 1st picture...maybe that is not so obvious to others...but when I look at the 2nd picture...I see healthier, happier AND skinnier!
I recently was asked if I am happy with where I am at in this weight loss Journey..am I happy with my progress. I did not answer the question immediately...I managed to talk incessantly about something else until I could provide some kind of answer.
At the time, my answer was Yes and No. Depending on the day! At times, I think...I have LOST 50lbs! and at times I think...I have ONLY lost 50lbs. When one has 120+lbs to lose...50 can feel like just a drop in the bucket.
But since I was asked the question...I have thought about it...Am I happy with my progress? Here is what came to my somewhat warped mind.
8 months ago..I kinda think this sign represented my life...
Not in the most literal sense...though at times over the past few years...I felt like I might literally need this sign..but instead...I am speaking figuratively...Food represented survival for me...It was my respite from my physical pain, from my emotional pain...It was the only way I felt like celebrating...when I was whipped physically...I could always throw back some CHOW...and when I was drained emotionally...Food was my pick me up! Food was an excellent reward and a wonderful comforter...still is! Truthfully though, only now do I realize this and only now can I verbalize this...It is uncomfortable. I find myself wanting to explain to those that do not know me well...but I am not going to...Regardless of what I ate, how often I ate, how much I ate...it was not the frequency, portion size or type of food that mattered...It was the effort I put into eating and the reasons I ate that made it harmful!
So 8 months ago, God sent me some inspiration in the form of 2 Olympic Stars..playing beach volleyball in London...a million miles away from where I was (in more ways than one).
In less than 72 hours of watching Misty May and Kerri Walsh win Olympic gold, I had decided to start this Journey...I committed...
In my mind...I would lose 120lbs in 12 months! 10lbs a month...no problem!
So here I am, 8 months later and I have lost 50lbs...that is roughly a little over 6 lbs per month. Not ideal...I guess. But my sign has changed.
So am I happy with my Progress? YES! It is not a perfect Journey...BUT...I am moving in positive direction that allows me to share the very things that made me WORK FOR FOOD! I have found the strength through Christ to follow my heart! What I am experiencing has for me proven that:
I will keep praying and I ask you to do the same. Much Love!