Will Work for Food

Hi...I was perusing through some photos and found a picture of my Mom and I a little over a  year ago...It was Easter 2012 and we both were just a few weeks away from a very rough time in both of our lives...

Here we are...one year later...Easter 2013...what a difference a year makes!

These are the some of the first pictures that I have looked at and really felt like I see a difference!  When I look at, I see less "Moon Pie" face...and more desire to live a better life!  I think we both look sick in the 1st picture...maybe that is not so obvious to others...but when I look at the 2nd picture...I see healthier, happier AND skinnier! 

 I recently was asked if I am happy with where I am at in this weight loss Journey..am I happy with my progress.  I did not answer the question immediately...I managed to talk incessantly about something else until I could provide some kind of answer. 

At the time, my answer was Yes and No.  Depending on the day!  At times, I think...I have LOST 50lbs!  and at times I think...I have ONLY lost 50lbs.  When one has 120+lbs to lose...50 can feel like just a drop in the bucket. 

But since I was asked the question...I have thought about it...Am I happy with my progress?  Here is what came to my somewhat warped mind. 

8 months ago..I kinda think this sign represented my life...

 

Not in the most literal sense...though at times over the past few years...I felt like I might literally need this sign..but instead...I am speaking figuratively...Food represented survival for me...It was my respite from my physical pain, from my emotional pain...It was the only way I felt like celebrating...when I was whipped physically...I could always throw back some CHOW...and when I was drained emotionally...Food was my pick me up!  Food was an excellent reward and a wonderful comforter...still is!  Truthfully though, only now do I realize this and only now can I verbalize this...It is uncomfortable.  I find myself wanting to explain to those that do not know me well...but I am not going to...Regardless of what I ate, how often I ate, how much I ate...it was not the frequency, portion size or type of food that mattered...It was the effort I put into eating and the reasons I ate that made it harmful!  

 

 

So 8 months ago, God sent me some inspiration in the form of 2 Olympic Stars..playing beach volleyball in London...a million miles away from where I was (in more ways than one).

 

In less than 72 hours of watching Misty May and Kerri Walsh win Olympic gold, I had decided to start this Journey...I committed...

 

In my mind...I would lose 120lbs in 12 months!  10lbs a month...no problem!

 

So here I am, 8 months later and I have lost 50lbs...that is roughly a little over 6 lbs per month.  Not ideal...I guess.  But my sign has changed. 

 

 

So am I happy with my Progress?  YES!  It is not a perfect Journey...BUT...I am moving in positive direction that allows me to share the very things that made me WORK FOR FOOD!  I have found the strength through Christ to follow my heart!  What I am experiencing has for me proven that:

I will keep praying and I ask you to do the same.  Much Love!

Jaime